Before setting foot in her own classroom for the first time, Kate Shanahan wondered if she really wanted to be a teacher for the rest of her life. A wise adviser suggested that her focus should be not so long term but rather about what to do right now. Find out how focusing on the first step can take the pressure off of forever, but lead you there anyway.
Guest Kate Shanahan, Dartmouth ’96, had grown up in Hanover in her elementary years and searched for colleges elsewhere. But nothing compared to the College on the Hill and so returned to rediscover the campus she knew so well. It took her time to find her groove but English literature lit a spark for her. Later, she found the Education department and the encounters she had there with professors and the material was life-changing. Upon graduation, she spent six more months in Hanover in the teacher preparation program, student teaching in a classroom that she’d been in as a nine-year-old.
While she loved teaching and knew she was good at it, she did wonder whether she wanted to make it her life-long profession. A wise adviser suggested that her focus should be not so long term but rather about what to do right now. That laid her on the expected path to teaching. But in taking spending time on the west coast during the six months before taking on her first full-time classroom, she took a by-road would set an unexpected course for a geographic switch.
In this episode, find out from Kate how focusing on the first step can take the pressure of off forever, but lead you there anyway…on ROADS TAKEN...with Leslie Jennings Rowley.
About This Episode's Guest
Kate Shanahan taught at several private schools on the East Coast before moving to California and joining the Harker faculty of the Harker School in San Jose, California, in 1998. During her long tenure at Harker, she has led the English department and has taught both upper elementary grades, chiefly grade 5 English and writing. She lives with her husband and two sons in sunny San Jose.
Executive Producer/Host: Leslie Jennings Rowley
Music: Brian Burrows
Find more episodes at https://roadstakenshow.com
Email the show at RoadsTakenShow@gmail.com
Kate Shanahan: But I said, I just don't know if this is it forever. And she worked in the, and she said, you know what, Kate, don't worry about what you want to do for the rest of your life. Just focus on what you want to do next. And once she said that, it almost gave me permission to, okay, I'm going to start teaching.
Leslie Jennings Rowley: Before setting foot in her own classroom for the first time, Kate Shanahan wondered if she really wanted to be a teacher for the rest of her life. A wise adviser suggested that her focus should not be so long term, but rather about what to do right now. Find out how focusing on the first step can take the pressure off of forever, but lead you there anyway, on today's roads taken with me, Leslie Jennings Rowley.
Today, I'm here with my friend, Kate Shanahan, and we are going to talk about how we learn and what we learn and what that says about us and our paths. So thank you so much for being here, Kate. It's great to see you.
KS: Same. Great to be here, Leslie. Thanks for having me.
LJR: All right, Kate, I start these the same way with the same two questions and they are: when we were in college, who were you? And when we were getting ready to leave, who did you think you would become?
KS: So I guess the short, answer to that is when I was at Dartmouth, I was a student and when I was leaving. I felt like I was going to become a teacher. But in order to answer who I was at Dartmouth, I think I should mention who I was before I got to Dartmouth. The reason why is because I grew up in Hanover, I spent my early childhood, mid childhood there.
My dad worked at the college. My mom taught high school French in neighboring Hartford, Vermont. My siblings and I went to Ray elementary school and Richmond middle school right down the street from the green. So growing up in Hanover, I never thought I would attend Dartmouth. Not that I didn't love growing up there, but it was my home. And I always thought college was a place you would leave home for, never a place where your parents lived or your family lived. But then we moved to Connecticut when I was in high school. And during my senior year, as I was traveling up and down the east coast, looking at schools, I found myself comparing everything to Dartmouth. The buildings and the campuses and even the students and nothing compared. So, I applied to go back and was thrilled to get in and to be able to go there. But my freshman year at Dartmouth was an adjustment for me because my classmates were experiencing Dartmouth for the first time. And I, on the other hand was, I guess, reacquainting myself with a college that I knew I loved, but had never gotten to experience when I was there.
So. It felt brand new to me, but in a different way. And I spent my first year at Dartmouth falling in love with the school all over again in my own way. And when the adjustment period was over, it took about a year. It wasn't until my sophomore year that I really became a student. I really felt like I had become a student.
LJR: So at that point, feeling a student. Did you already have in mind that you were going to eventually flip that equation and be on the teaching side of education?
KS: Not really. No, I, at first, what I discovered was that I loved literature. That first decision I made, I guess, was to really throw myself into majoring in English.
I remember taking an English class from Ivy Schweitzer. My sophomore year. She was just a, just an awesome professor in the English department. It was a 19th century literature class. I loved it. Engaging. Interesting. And I, I wrote a paper on this novel we read called The Awakening, which is a great novel and oh, I just felt so confident with this paper and my points.
And I thought, oh, I got this. This is like, I'm going to wow. Her. And she gave me a B, and I remember thinking what, like, why isn't this an A plus, like what? So I remember going back to my dorm room and talking to my roommate about it and my roommate saying, um, why don't you talk to her? You could do that, you know, and I thought, okay, I, I guess I'm going to talk to her.
So I sent her a blitz saying, Hey, can I come by office hours? And I just basically went in and pleaded my case. I said, I know you gave me a B for these reasons, but I really wanted to show this example, or I really thought this was a better analogy. I don't even remember what I said, but she was impressed that I had come in and kind of pleaded my case.
And she said, you know, I'm going to boost your grade a little bit. I'm going to give you a B plus 89. And I remember feeling like it was an A plus. I thought, oh my gosh, I just made it. And that really just kind of, it had a big impact on me. One, I kind of discovered my voice. I learned to fight for my ideas, and it made me just feel much more passionate about English.
So that was the first piece that kind of made me think. I want to make this part of my future, but then I took, then I got into the education department and that's when I think things really started to change for me. There were so many great, great professors in the education department, Andrew Garrett, Carl Tomb. My freshman year, I took a class from him. He was phenomenal. Randy Testa. And ultimately it was Professor Benswinger, Robert Benswinger who really changed my life. He kind of set me on my path, changed the complete trajectory of my career by asking me to be a TA for his Ed 20 class. And I don't even remember what it was called. Something like education in society. [LJR: Yeah.] That was it wasn't it. Did you take it?
LJR: I did. I think I took it though later from Garrett probably senior year. And it was even then had I taken it earlier, it would have been trajectory changing. I think when I took it, it was just kind of uh eye-opening.
KS: Yeah. And it was that for me too. So. Yeah. He called me into his office. I had already taken a class from him and we kind of had, had a friendly relationship and he called me in one afternoon and said, I'd like you to be my TA. One of my TAs, there were 10 or 15 for Ed 20. And I said, you know, I've been trying to get into Ed 20 last semester it wasn't open and my schedule didn't allow it. I haven't taken the class. So I don't think I can be a TA. And he said, no. He goes, I'd like you to be a TA. He said, every year, I like to have one TA who has not taken it. To kind of give perspective. And I was like, okay, I'm your girl. And it was just, it taught me so much about teaching and helping my fellow classmates, you know, some of whom were my age, some of them were younger, teach them how to write and, and also how to just understand that whole field of education and society. And I loved it. And I remember meeting a girl one time who was struggling with it, with an essay she was writing and, we met one-on-one and I was kind of explaining to her how to change it, what changes to make. And we finished with the conversation. She says, oh my gosh, I get it now. Thank you so much. And I thought, okay. You're welcome, I guess. And little experiences like that just made me realize this was it.
LJR: Yeah. And so, although we couldn't major in education, I think right now, Right. But they did allow you to do the, I don't know if it was during or a little bit after graduation, the in classroom teaching and getting a certificate and that sort of thing. Did that happen?
KS: That's correct. So, no, you couldn't major in it. And by then, I was pretty deep in my English major and loved that. But I took enough classes. I think you could minor in Ed. I took an equal number of classes and instead I entered the teacher certification program. And that's what put me kind of in the classroom teaching. There was a group of us, probably 10 of us who were training to teach elementary school. There was also a secondary program for secondary school. And I knew I liked the younger kids. Wasn't really sure what grade, but Randy Testa was the professor that headed that program. Then I started really training to be a teacher and we took classes in that. And my senior year, they put us part-time in a school, local school.
And then after I graduated, I came back and spent six months student teaching in a classroom in Hanover. Coincidence: the classroom that I was actually a student in when I was nine years old. So that was a full circle.
LJR: Yeah, for sure. And then it, didn't dissuade you. It reinforced that this is the right thing. Maybe not back in Hanover for the rest of your life. [KS: Right.] So upon graduation, what was the path?
KS: I remember going to lunch with Dean Langford, Sylvia Langford. She was our Dean and we were friends. And I remember thinking Sylvia--or I called their Dean Langford them--I just don't know if I want to teach for the rest of my life. Like, I'm not really sure I'm doing this teacher training program. I knew I loved teaching and I had parents that were in education. That kind of felt like it was in my blood. But I said, I just don't know if this is it forever. And she looked at me and she said, you know what, Kate, don't worry about what you want to do for the rest of your life. Just focus on what you want to do next. And once she said that, it almost gave me permission to, okay, I'm going to start teaching and we'll see where it leads me. And that really was just the advice I needed at that time to have a…you know, it was, there was enough in me where I thought, I know I love this, so let me see if I can do this for a living. And that was really what, you know, how I began my post-college life.
LJR: Geographically, so you were no longer really a Hanover kid, but did you have any specific, like this is, this is the region I want to be in? I want to go forth and go elsewhere? What was the thought there?
KS: I could not, I mean, I, I thought I would stay in new England for the rest of my life. I was born and raised there. My family lived there for generations after I graduated from Dartmouth. Again, I went back and did my training at Dartmouth. And then I, it was January. And it was middle of the school year. I knew I wasn't going to get, you're [not] going to get a job halfway through the school year. And I kind of had the six months, this wiggle room.
Did I want to sub? No, I'm not really interested in subbing. I'd rather be a, you know, be a full-time teacher. And we had friends; my parents had dear friends who worked at Stanford in the athletic department and I thought, oh. I remember talking to my parents one day. And they had mentioned to their friends, you know, Kate's got six months to kind of get ready to start her career. And I always loved California. I visited a couple times. I'd always loved athletics. You know, worked at the gym when I was at Dartmouth, managed the basketball team for a year or two. And I said, I reached out to the family. I said, do you have anything at Stanford? I wouldn't mind just coming out, being an intern, you know, just, I’d love to just experience California for six months. And sure enough, he said, yeah, come on out, come on out.
And there was an, I had an internship in the rowing and sailing department at Stanford for six months. I had done a little rowing at Dartmouth, but sailing, I was completely clueless. But it didn't matter. I was just doing administrative work. I lived with them and ended up finding a nannying job that kind of covered just living expenses out there. But those six months really was my taste of, this is what it would be like to live in a climate like this and an air in an area like this. And it kind of, I think that was the beginning of my interest in being on the west coast. But then I went back, I went back and taught in Connecticut for a year after that and thought I still need to be here. I'm back. I'm a new England girl went back to Connecticut, taught for a year. And at that point I thought, you know what? I miss that place. I want to start interviewing. And I did.
LJR: And you did, and I'm sure it could have gone any number of ways, but you landed at a school where 20-some years later you still are.
KS: Yeah, right? Yeah. This is my 24th.
LJR: Yeah. And Sylvia Langford did not tell you to find the thing that you were going to do forever.
KS: No, she didn't. And. I remember getting the job at Harker when, when they called me and said, we'd like to offer you a fifth grade English position. Part of me was so excited. And part of me thought, I'll just do this for a couple of years, you know, see how it goes.
And then, then I'll go back, then I'll go back to new England. And I called my mom and told her mom, I have good news and bad news. What do you want first? And she said, bad news, I want the bad news first. I said, well, the bad news is it's far away. And then she kind of laughed and then started crying a little bit. That's what my mom does. And she said, I know what the good news is and you have to go. Yeah. And, and I've been at Harker all these years. It's an amazing place to work. I love my students, my colleagues, the environment, the academic environment just is so fulfilling in many different ways, that many different parts of my adulthood. It was where I met my husband. Then we had two children and watching them as students go through Harker and then just the relationships I've been able to make with my students over the years has just made it all worth it.
LJR: And have you stayed with the fifth grade writing?
KS: Yes. So primarily I've been fifth grade, fifth grade English teacher all these years. There were, there are years where I taught fourth. There were years where I taught sixth. I was lower school department chair for many years, just for English, but I'm right now, fifth grade English, which is a focus on literature. Right. Grammar vocabulary and all that comes with it.
LJR: Frankly, all those things you were doing for us in Ed 20, because I remember feeling some days in that class, like this is basic writing and how have I gotten this far? And I'm not as good at it as I thought I would be, or I thought I was, really. Now I'm going to put you back on that chair with Sylvia for a second, because had she had the crystal ball. And you'd asked you kind of relayed to her I don't know if I want to do this for the rest of my life. And she looked in and said, well, you're going to be doing it for the rest of your life, or at least the first 20, some years. And, and she could have said, so if you don't want it, don't start it. [KS: Right.] What do you think you would have done or thought?
KS: All I can say is, I mean, looking back, I think that was the advice I needed at that point being 21, 22 worried that I was starting something that I wasn't 100% sure of. Looking back, I think, gosh, we were all, I mean, were we a hundred percent sure of anything at that point?
Um, no. And knowing what I know now, right now at 47, I’m 100% sure I chose right. And that is, that feels good. Knowing that there are days where, listen, there are days where I don't want to go in and teach for whatever reason. Maybe I've got a cold. Maybe I know it's going to be a hard lesson. Maybe, you know, that naughty kid is making my life tough, but ultimately at the end of the day, it's really, it's where I'm supposed to be. It's kind of where I was destined to be in that sense.
LJR: Yeah. And that's a really good distinction too, because I think had she just stopped at, well, I can see that you're going to do this for a long time. One might say. Okay, well, but maybe I was just lazy, but no, like the other side is, oh no, I've loved it. You've loved it. If she could say, oh, I see in the crystal ball and you're going to love this forever. [KS: Yes.] That probably would have been just the permission that you needed as well as just do what you want to do for now. But we never know if it's going to feed us the way. We hope or in ways that we could never imagine and are going to be positive. So I'm glad she told you to take one step. Cause that's all that we can ever do. Really solid advice.
KS: That’s all we can do. Yeah. And she actually, we actually reconnected about six months ago on Facebook. She found me and I told her that story. So it's very fitting that we're talking about it now, too. I mean, all these years, I, we have, I have not been good about keeping in touch. It's just what happens. Right. And we reconnected and I said, oh my gosh, by the way, I have to tell you what you told me when we were a senior and I've never forgotten it. And thank you so much.
LJR: Yeah. It's great. It's great advice at any stage, frankly. [KS: Yup. Yeah, absolutely.] You know, even at 47, you think, oh, if I make this change, it's going to be the rest of my life. Well, maybe, but maybe not. And just take what you need now. [KS: Yep.] So Kate, the 23 year ride has I'm sure been great. The last year and a half has been quite something. Do you want to talk about kind of how that might set up the trajectory of the next 23 years for you or the next one year for you and the way you're thinking about things?
KS: Yeah, so we were in San Jose, California, pretty aggressive in how we handled COVID. We shut down March of 2020, and were remote for the rest of the year, the school year. And then for all of last school year up until April, we were 100% remote. So there was no in-person program at all at Harker. Harker is a big school. So it's, you know, over 1500 students grades K through 12, pre-K through 12. And it was really, it made it very difficult for us to work with students in the classroom and do a hybrid. Although, I'm sure there were some parents that wanted it, You know, we all wanted it for our, for our children in that sense. Like we, we know that they missed being in person. It was just the safest thing in the sort of thing for us to do was to, was to teach remotely. And I had no idea going in how crazy and hard it would be, you know, by the time you've taught for 20 years, I didn't have to do a lot of grading on the weekends. Knew to use my prep periods during the school day and just work through them. And I got a, I had a handle on my grading, my correcting my assignments, and really felt like I had just things in order. I had my teaching life. I had my parenting life, my being a spouse, my own life. And last year was just everything, everything combined.
So I would be working over 12 hour days probably where I would be, you know, getting up at five or six in the morning, kind of to get ready. And the school day was over at three 30, but the problem with that is then all afternoon and evening, I'm creating assignments that I can share with my students all electronically. There was no really, of course there was no in-person grading. There's no in-person discussions, all that kind of stuff. It was all over zoom. And these are fifth graders. So they just don't have the attention span. And they tried, they tried so hard. I mean, my heart broke for them. I'd see the zoom screen come up in the morning and these 16 or 17 little faces, you know, with breakfast next to them, rubbing their eyes. Here we go again. And it was, it was a full day of teaching and a full day of learning for these kids. They were online all day. It wasn't just a morning program. It was Harker for the elementary school we did. It was the same school day, 42 minute periods. So it was a lot of work, but the work aside, the whole reason why I feel like you go into teaching.
Because there's a part of you that loves connecting with students. So of course there's a delivery of information and transferring knowledge, all that kind of stuff that I could do over zoom that I just created slideshows and taught to, you know, talk my heart out. But what I missed, like the, the connection you make with the students is the icing on the cake. And when you can't have any spontaneous conversations with them, In the hallway or when they're leaving or when they come into school or when you overhear something, then you really feel the loss. And I miss that last year, I really missed just those, those little conversations because everybody's on mute. You know, you got to stay muted. Right. And there were days where I was like, okay, I'm not even using this mute button. Just talk just, and if we talk over each other, we talk over each other. So it was, it was tough. Right. So now. We are back 100% in person. We went back hybrid in the spring where some students could come, some students elected to stay home. So in the spring I went back to the classroom and I taught hybrid, which is basically you teach the 10 kids who decided to come to school and then you've got the laptop projected and I've got my six or seven zoomers at home. So there was that, which is a whole different, you know, kind of. Learning I had to do, but now I'm a hundred percent back and the students are a hundred percent back.
LJR: Does it feel just as it did pre COVID or does it feel just different?
KS: I would say both. So, um, there is the first couple of weeks of the school year. It took me some time to adjust to. Noise and classroom chatter. I felt I was, oh my gosh, why are they talking? What am I, why are they talking so much? Is my classroom management not working? And, and it just felt really hard. And then I thought, wait a minute. I don't think it's my students. I think it's my problem. I need to just chill out. They are so excited to be back all masked up. Some of them double masked. Yeah. They couldn't care less about the masks. They are so excited to be back in person with their classmates and with teachers. So I think, I would say just the past couple of weeks, I've thought I remember how good this feels. This kind of feels like the good old days. It's a new, it's a new kind of good old day. I don't want to say post pandemic good old days, but, but you know, we're slowly coming out of it. It's starting to feel like how I remembered it. Where I finish a class and I'm exhausted and I'm so excited. Didn't really feel that on zoom because it was kind of more one-sided. But now, you know, I will have a great class and I see kids leaving and they're laughing and they're talking and I think, okay. We're slowly, slowly coming back. I'm hoping that you know, that energy continues throughout the year.
LJR: Yeah. Well, I would say after. You know, 20 years of little changes here and there and spicing things up. There's nothing like a pandemic to change it completely. But, there may just be some settling time for you to feel like, okay, now we've gotten to this different groove. Are there things that you are thinking about? Like, okay, I might tweak this here and there, but what is, what's the next chapter feel like for you?
KS: I think the next chapter is more growth, more change, more, just making myself better as a teacher. I don't want to lose the, just the philosophy that I have, but I definitely want to continue to grow and change and challenge myself. I think I need to give it a year of just kind of being back and remembering how to do it. I'm always looking for new ideas, new ways of teaching, new ways of connecting with kids and with my colleagues. So kind of looking forward to what that future may hold.
LJR: Well, I think growth is always a good option, particularly when you're not exactly sure what that next step is going to be. So, Kate, I think it is so great to hear your path, recognizing what can come from just doing what you need to do now. And seeing how far now can take you. It's been a real pleasure to reconnect this way and thanks so much for sharing your story.
KS: Thanks, Leslie, my pleasure. And thanks again for having me. This has been fun.
LJR: That was Kate Shanahan, who's been a teacher at The Harker School in San Jose, California for nearly a quarter century, mostly teaching fifth grade and writing skills. Sometimes our first steps lead us to our forever calling. And sometimes it's just the first of many decision points to try new things. That's why we're so glad you keep coming back to listen to the various ways a quarter century can unfold. Please follow, review, and share our show@roadstakenshow.com or wherever you get your podcasts so that others will find us and join me, Leslie Jennings Rowley, on future episodes of Roads Taken.